Is That It?

I wake up in the morning, wash up, wear my semi-formal clothes and go to work. There, I try to do my best, have a smile on my face even if I wasn't OK, make sure that I listen to who ever talks to me even if I really hate the person, if I could I would perform extra work or help those who need it. If there was nothing at all I would go and sit with those who I feel comfortable with or around, we could simply just sit or talk if someone felt like talking. I did my best to somehow innovate in this typical medical field, with its typical routine work. But I couldn’t due to external factors who try to suppress creativity.

Suddenly I feel something.

Anyways,

I go back home and spend some time with my lovely mother talking about what so ever, the latest news and up dates about different topics while sharing a cup of tea and maybe a bite or two. Then afterwards prepare my self for a heavy digestable number of lectures due to the fact of me doing my Master's Degree, by going to University.
I take education seriously, try to be committed, dedicated, honest, and hard worker. I get rewarded afterwards through my grades and marks. At those moments I feel I'm achieving something. But again there is that thing!

I go back home, sit with my family for a while, have a little dinner, check my emails, read a little, then go to bed, with that something somewhere!

On regular bases, I check my little small business that I have started two years ago, and see that somehow it's growing slowly and steadily. Al7amd'Ellah.

Whenever I have the time, I make sure that I would go to the gym and work out, studying have taken away my commitment to the gym for the sake of education. I would socialize and go out with my buddies (el rabi3) or friends. Yes there is a difference between them! DUH!

But then there is something!

I read, listen to music, watch movies whenever I had the chance. So I'm fulfilling my hobbies.

Today while I was in the gym, trying to work out and stop my mind from the roller coaster ride that it has been riding since eight months so far, I suddenly started to think of that "thing" I was feeling in whatever I do. I work, study, socialize, pray, eat healthy and work out when I can, but then what’s next?

I suddenly started to think, what's next? Am I successful?

No, I don’t think so. Success would be, at least maybe to me and I could be wrong, when someone is on the Top 100 influential people in the world or has won the Nobel prize for what ever he/she has done.

So success is way too early for me. Am I satisfied? No.
There is something missing, that has nothing to do with whatever I have achieved or will achieve in future.
It's like this empty space within my chest, like a ball of air.
Is this what's life all about?

What is that thing that is missing?
What is life all about?
Is this it?

When we were young, my parents, I bet along with lots of other parents to their kids, told us that life is so great and nice. We only need to study and grow to see it.

Here I am. This isn't so great to me! In fact it's dull and boring. Or am I still suppose to search while I'm walking in this path they call life!
I don’t know.
Who knows!